Eccentric co-workers–we all have them. But at my current job, I may have hit the jackpot.
Here’s three of my co-workers, (all nicknamed for their quirks) who tip the scale for absurdity in the workplace.
1. First, there’s Ladies Man.
L Man’s workday on a pie chart would look something like this:
75% Smooth talking the college girls volunteering for the day at the children’s hospital.
10% Exchanging parking passes for Starbucks drinks. With the ladies.
10% Sleeping in the bookstore.
5% Performing his work duties.
L Man’s shenanigans eventually lost him his gig, but I can guarantee he’s still got them digits!
2. “Can you drive a stick well?” is always a question they ask in interviews for valet positions.
Smokey apparently didn’t hear the “well” part.
Last I saw him, he had mistaken 5th gear for first and smoked out the clutch pretty bad. Smelled like burnt squirrel.
When he wasn’t smoking out gears, he could be found doing push-ups by the vehicle drop off. I’m sure for a Veteran valeting his car, he’d think his mind was playing tricks: “Dear God! Where am I?”
Smokey once did 100 pushups in a day. We might’ve been proud of him, had it not been so weird.
3. Vin D loves action movies. Vin D also loves revving the gas like he’s in an action movie, like The Fast and the Furious. Alright Diesel, at least postpone your antics until the driver is gone…and not still watching you!
Also, when he backs in a car, he hangs half of his body out the window to better judge distance. God forbid he ever falls out the window and gravity runs its course straight into a parked Beamer.
How would you explain that to somebody?
“Well, uh, my torso was sort of extended out the window and…”
About that time, Donald Trump would mysteriously appear, and announce publicly, “You’re fired!”
But it wouldn’t be the words “you’re fired” that would sting. Oh no, his combover would do all the scolding.
Paws and Eggs 